Tuesday, March 23, 2010

And the mountain keeps building...

Today was what I expected it to be...nerve racking and crazy. The mountain we are climbing with this pregnancy keeps building and building. I am starting to think that the more I hear...the more numb I may get...but God intervenes and releases pressure from my heart by giving me tears. I needed to talk it all out today...and I am thankful for my friends and family for that. I think I've been able to chew and swallow the news...now we just have to make it through all the stuff on Friday's appointment. Here is what I posted on facebook notes:

We had a 4 hour doctor's appointment today with the Pediatric Heart Specialist and Tech. It was not a fun process. I almost passed out and threw up at one point because my nerves got the best of me. They finally put what puzzle pieces they could for Lily's heart. They found 6 problems today: 1. Atrial Septal Defect 2. Ventrical Septal Defect 3. Dilated Main Pulmonary Artery 4. Abnormal Pulmonary Valve 5. Small Branch Pulmanary Arteries 6. Small Ductus Arteriosus The only one that can not be fixed by surgery is the small branch pulmonary arteries...this is where we need the major miracle. She needs these to grow bigger. We need all the prayers we can get. Today's news means we will end up having to switch hospitals and obgyn...plus she is more than likely gonna have multiple heart surgeries. I am believing God! I am asking Him to be BIGGER than He has ever been. I am far from perfect from dealing with all this, but I am still here....trucking forward...and knowing that whatever ends up happening...I'm in His hands always! :)

Saturday, March 20, 2010


Michael ended up taking me to the Labor & Delivery today since I have been having pain for almost 24 hours straight. I got an IV with some liquids and pain medicine...which helped me take a nice nap. Lily has moved positions so the on call Dr. decided that I have some scar tissue that Lily or the Uterus is pushing up and causing the pain. She looked great on the ultrasound...moving as always. We have the following appointments this week:

Monday with Dr. Donnelly, OBGYN
Tuesday with the Pediatric Heart Specialist
Friday with Dr. Blake, OBGYN Specialist

My blood test results came back for the following:
Torch Test - Traces that I had an Old Infection, but neither one of us has any current infections.
Glucose Test - PASSED...I was very excited about this one!

We should hear back about the Blood Clot Test Results on Fridays appointment.

Pray that all the eating I've been doing has given Lily more nutrients for her to catch up and grow in the areas she has been lacking...plus that her heart turns out perfect in every way. This past week has been rough for Michael and I, but we are trusting God.

I was able to attend a Women's Retreat the last 2 days, which really filled me up! I'm so glad to have amazing Christians in my life to help keep me filled up!

Monday, March 15, 2010

And the climbing continues...

Before I can get to other stories that happened right before the surgery and the 6 weeks following, I want to update you on our recent climb. We had a doctors appointment with an OBGYN Specialist, who specializes in the highest risk pregnancies. We found out from our regular OBGYN that there were some concerns and worries. Thank God they got us into the specialist within the week of discovering the complications.

I will say that my intuition is stronger than ever before. I knew something wasn't right...still hopeful...but couldn't shake the uneasy feelings. After being at the specialist appointment for over an hour, she finally got down to the logistics....here is what I posted as an overview on my facebook notes:

"Lily's Health Inside the Womb"
We are going to have to see a Pediatric Heart Doctor since Lily's right side of her heart is bigger than the left and she has a possible hole in the middle. Her growth is still behind on the tummy, so we will be seeing a lot of the OBGYN Specialist. She thinks during my blood and weight loss that Lily's health was compromised and caused the growth problems.I knew losing 20 pounds wasn't going to go without some side effects.

My umbilical cord is not flowing in one side where there should be two parts, which could be another reason for her growth problems. I'm adding 28 g of protein into my diet to see if this helps. I go to Monday to get my Glucose and Blood Clot Testing, which requires lots of blood. Pray this doesn't effect my levels, since I've not had high numbers since I lost 1/2 my blood supply. I go back to my regular OBGYN on the 22nd for some of my test results (I may get those back before then). I go see the OBGYN Specialist on the 26th for another ultrasound to see if the added protein helps and her tests results. If Lily's growth hasn't changed for the better, they will monitor us each week. We also will be seeing the Pediatric Specialist within the next 3 weeks if they can get us in.

Worst case scenarios: Lily may have to come early because it would be better for her survival than remaining in my womb....when that time comes, she may have to have heart surgery if the hole doesn't close up. Keep us in your prayers. I know God wouldn't get us this far and let us be...He's carrying us right now in his arms and I'm holding on tighter than ever! Love you all!

Well that about covers it for your updates. I want to say that God has blessed me with amazing people...Godly ones at that...and I couldn't ask for anything more. This mountain is a gigantic monster, but I look back over my entire life...in experiences...people I've met...and things I've accomplished and failed...and realize more than ever before...my tool shed is full...and I'm still climbing. I have no idea what the future holds....except one thing...God will get me to the top! Whatever mountain you are facing now...get into your tool shed he's provided and start climbing! Who knows when you will reach the top....but I promise you this...the view when you get there will be breathtakingly beautiful....that's what I'm looking forward to. :)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Soul Food

I was researching strength in times of trouble and found the following website: http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/CBNTeachingSheets/promises_comfort_in_trouble.aspx
I love the verses very much! I hope you enjoy the read!


Comfort in Times of Trouble
By J. Steven Lang

CBN.com -- What does God promise his people? Relief from all troubles in the next world, relief from some troubles in this life. Faithful people throughout the centuries witness to dramatic deliverances from sickness, from financial woes, from all manner of troubles. Flesh-and-blood human beings have testified to miracles. They happen.

But not always. Sometimes we aren't relieved by God. Sometimes we merely endure. This isn't such a bad thing. We are never nearer to God than when we are troubled. In times of comfort and ease we forget him. In the worst of times, we suddenly remember, "Ah, what if I asked God for help?" Sometimes the answer is the help we pray for. Sometimes the answer is "Lean on me, and you will survive and thrive."

Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth. My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.

Psalm 73:25-26

Remember your promise to me, for it is my only hope. Your promise revives me; it comforts me in all my troubles.

Psalm 119:50

The LORD is my shepherd; I have everything I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.

Even when I walk through the dark valley of death, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.

Psalm 23:1-4

The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the strength of my salvation, and my stronghold.

Psalm 18:2

Weeping may go on all night, but joy comes with the morning.

Psalm 30:5

God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. So we will not fear, even if earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea.

Psalm 46:1-2

You have allowed me to suffer much hardship, but you will restore me to life again and lift me up from the depths of the earth.

Psalm 71:20

The LORD is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him.

Psalm 103:13

Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy. They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest.

Psalm 126:5

He heals the brokenhearted, binding up their wounds.

Psalm 147:3

"Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

"When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior."

Isaiah 43:2

"God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

"God blesses those who are persecuted because they live for God, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs.

"God blesses you when you are mocked and persecuted and lied about because you are my followers. "Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, the ancient prophets were persecuted, too."

Matthew 5:4, 10-12

"Not even a sparrow, worth less than a penny, can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows."

Matthew 10:29-31

Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke fits perfectly, and the burden I give you is light."

Matthew 11:28-30

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed and broken. We are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit.

That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are quite small and won't last very long. Yet they produce for us an immeasurably great glory that will last forever!

2 Corinthians 4:8, 16-17